I'm a terrible liar, yet I lie every single day. I lie to myself and to others about how I feel. The truth is I never moved on, I never will and I don't want to. I've been reliving memories of this time 365 days ago. The best time of my life. The hardest time. The most fulfilling. The time where I felt like I was at home with him. It will always be about him. Until someone hurts me more. Until simone enthralls me more. Until I find someone who understands me more. Until that time I'll just be waiting for him. Waking for him to wake up and find me. Leave her and find me. So we can sit on the back porch and talk about the relativity of pain, and the meaning of art, and the pointlessness of religion. And he would play his acoustic- the sweetest tunes. Until that time, I'll wish and hope and dream and play my fingers over his first gift of love.