This is difficult to put into words. The actual meaning of the situation for me may not be understood by readers. I am sitting at the Perth underground by myself, waiting for a boy and for once I dont have this sickening sense of impending doom welling in my stomach. There is no longer an inherent fear that exists perpetually. I'm just me waiting for a train with a good book and my own company. I'm so happy right now because I have never, ever felt like this before. I've always been afraid of being alone- dreaded the thought of my own presence; now I embrace it. I mean, yeah I'm waiting to meet a boy, but I'm not fretting, not wishing he was here already. I'm just being.